My Clock


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finding

Wednesday, May 6, 2009

every night
i lie on the bed
forcing myself to fall asleep
but nothing seems to be working
what's making me stay awake?
my thoughts? my worries?
am i really thinking alot?
but what am i thinking?
what worries do i have?

why do i feel that its starting all over again?
my feelings my mind my focus
changed
im afraid!
afraid of the past
afraid of the future
i dont know what lies ahead
and that scares me

what do i want?
what can i do to find out
what i really want
torn in between such situations
i cant seem to find a way out
and i guess
thats slowly killing me
my drive my motivatin my fire
they're slowly fading away


reaching out for it
with all my heart and soul
whilst protecting myself
from falling into it

Dream and Discover

Monday, May 4, 2009

A new day, a new life, a new journey, a new excitement, a new adventure.

Been thinking a lot these few days. Realised what is worth hanging on to and what is not. All journeys have their beginning and ending.

The start of an adventure is usually excited, anticipating, yet nervous, having to figure out what lies ahead; facing it with enthusiasm, believing there's no gloomy days ahead, just bright and sunny days.

As the journey moves on, dark and gloomy days appear, finding it difficult to cope, and constantly complaining the existence of such days, fighting over immaterial matters; distorting the whole adventure, slowing things down, and yet making through the hard times, which brings us to a new day, a bright one indeed. A bright and sunny day, humming our favourite song, enjoying every happy moments we spent. But, such times end quickly without even realising it. Going through such times, blinded by what's left in front, believing this is the right one, not discovering the undiscovered, what a waste.

A tiring yet adventurous one, been an up- and down-hill ride, going through it from time to time, getting bored and sick of it, but not wanting to end it, see no diversed path, still holding on to initial beliefs, convincing it will work - time will prove it.


"Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn't do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover."
-- Mark Twain
Dare to dream
Dare to discover
Life is short
Don't live with regrets

Blinded before

Friday, May 1, 2009

a new journey ahead . . . .

things happened for the past few weeks which made me lost all my concentration. i cried, i blamed, i complained.

thinking back on what i done, i feel so stupid right now.

what was i thinking?

i have my own life to live. the future is bright ahead.

at least i am happy with my life right now. suddenly i realised so many things that i never knew all these while. it's surprising to hear that honestly, but im glad.

at least i know the truth, and i'm happy with it.

=)

people get blinded often
and it takes time to realise
the world is not dull afterall

life is a journey

Wednesday, April 29, 2009

its been pretty long since my last post. . *dead blog*

well. . a quick update on my life so far

- easter break started end of march
- visited sheik at manchester
- visited ron at birmingham
- visited prague
- twisted my ankle at prague
- ron came down to bristol
- met up with jia and went around bristol
- went to the mobile theme park at the Downs
- emo-ed *some of u might know what happened*
- tried revising for finals, but failed
- emo-ed even more
- went to the library for group revision
- now revising at hme :) *more effective i should say*
- made things clear (=
- miss hanging around with my frens *haven't been talking to u guys much lately*
- went for my first acupuncture session at bristol to treat my ankle, but apparently found out more about other problems *darn expensive, i'll be soo broke by the time i finish my treatments*
- attending jia' bday bash this sat
- dont know wht present to buy
- classes started *last week of classes for my degree year* i don't want it to end!
- really have to focus on revision
- exams in 2 weeks
- summer holiday trip in one month
- back home in 2 months

Basically, books lecture notes tutorials additional articles blackboard calculator and table is what my life is all about right now.

My final exam is up in 2 weeks should concentrate hard on it. i dont want to just pass. i want to score but im doubting myself. been lazing around alot - facebook msn tvshows, basically my laptop is my main distraction right now!! -

Time flies without even me realising it. i cant believe that i will be finishing my degree programme soon. the memories of entering college life is still so fresh in my mind, moreover uni life. it seems like just yesterday i started college, and here i am ending my course in 1 month's time. gosh.

been keeping in touch with high school mates recently and, to be honest, it does feel good, but the sad thing is, it brings back all the high school memories that we shared, and makes me want to turn back time, and never leave that period. to all youngsters out the *gosh i sound old, , pfft* enjoy your high school years. they are THE BEST YEARS OF YOUR LIFE. *sigh, , right now, i do regret not being active that time*.

the best thing about high school, to me, is having all your classmates around with you, spending the best times with them - fooling around, sharing the happiness and sadness, gossiping, causing chaos in class, eating in class, sleeping in class, skipping class, texting in class, hiding all our stuffs when we know there are spot checks. . . . .. and the list goes on and on and on.

it really makes me cherish my high school mates alot, realising that they are the ones closest to us, and knows us best. they are by far the ones whom you can trust most, and will always be there for you no matter what happpens. no doubt friends from college and university can be your true friends, but to me, most of them are just friends whom you can mix along, have fun with, but not when sharing your deepest thoughts. *well, thats to me, not everyone thinks so* :)

gosh, , i really miss high school. how i wish i could turn back time, but then, life is all about moving on. the end of a journey is abeginning of another journey. and it goes on and on. all those memories will definitely remain in our hearts till the very end of our journey. it's always good to think back the good and bad times we've been through, and it makes you cherish them more than anything . .

friends come and go
but truefriends are hard to find

为什么??

Friday, March 20, 2009

为什么这世上会有那么不讲道理的人
以为自己很讨人喜欢,
以为自己能随便吩咐别人做事。
你以为你是谁啊??
公主?皇后?我的主人??
基本的尊重根本不存在
想要别人尊重你,
你得先学习尊重别人吧。
我试着控制自己,
不让自己为这种事
感到心酸,激怒。
好歹我懂得尊重。
要是我在你面前“爆”
那,我和你有什么差别呢?
我相信天有眼。
一切交给天处理。
忍一时,风平浪静,
退一步,海阔天空。
学习忍耐。

Mixed Emotions

Tuesday, March 10, 2009

Yay!
No more assignments!
Im done with my final assignment
I'm freeee

yooo hoooo. . . . .. . . . . .

it's been a tiring week (two weeks to be accurate)
screwed up sleep time
screwed up meal time
all cuz of assignmnets

*damn u assignments. I wished u didn't exist*

havent been sleeping well lately,
been sleeping really lately (4 - 5 in the morning)
i look so worn out

grrrrrrrrrr

but nvm, i'll be able to sleep nicely from now
one month break at least
before i start my final battle
FINAL EXAM!!!

wheeeeeee

i'm so happppyy!!

BUTTTT

i'm frustrated as welll

KLM is an ASSSSS
and i really mean itt
their service sucks!!!
I SINCERELY ADVICE NOT TO TAKE KLM!!

here's the story

i flew back to KL last holiday by KLM
1. flight delayed
2. seat was spoilt - had to sit straight for 13 hrs, the service button was not working
3. my baggage couldn't make it on time due to the delay
4. when i went back Bristol, my baggage was DAMAGED - got a deep scratch from it. thank god it wasn't rusty, otherwise would need to go hospital and check! You're lucky KLM!!
5. reported my baggage damage, took them awhile to reply me
6. no repsonse from them after that
7. sent another mail a wweeek later, no response,
8. sent another the week after, no response
9. this time was frustrated, complaint like mad, and thank god they responded by stating i would receive a response SOON
10. received response 1 MONTH LATER - im like wth
11. excess baggage came collected my baggage last friday *happy*
12. this morning returned the bag to me WITH NOTHING DONE!!

THE DRIVER SAID THERE WAS NO DESTINATION TO WHERE THE BAGGAGE NEEDS TO BE SENT TO, AND SO HE SENT IT BACK TO ME

HOW SMARTTTTTT

IM SO DAMN FRUSTRATED WITH THEIR LOUSY SERVICE
KONON-NYA WELL-KNOWN COMPANY

YEA!!!

WELL-KNOWN FOR CRAPPY SERVICEE
WTH IS WRONG WITH THIS COMPANY
CURSE U TO KEEP MAKING LOSS!!!


sent a really frustrated complaint letter - this time, no more nice!!!

hopefully they'll take the matter into concern

FCUK EWWW KLM!!

I HATE U!!

companies are so irresponsible these days
dont they know that after service is important
customers are have big impact
like me!
damn u
but i should be happy

tiring ><

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

my final assignment!!

working on it

draining me ><

exhausted

tired

LET ME GO!!

stupid assignment
screw u!